Every parent dreams of raising children who feel confident, capable, safe, and deeply loved. Yet the day-to-day reality often looks very different. Power struggles, defiance, emotional outbursts, shame, and exhaustion can slowly erode the parent-child bond. Many parents find themselves repeating cycles they once promised to break-yelling, nagging, bribing, punishing, or negotiating just to get through the day.
Parenting: The Rules offers a transformative alternative-a parenting approach rooted in respect, connection, and emotional leadership rather than control. Drawing on decades of experience counseling families, Dr. Susan M. Thomson presents 20 essential parenting precepts that reshape communication, deepen trust, and build emotional resilience in both parent and child. These principles are practical, compassionate, and immediately actionable.
At its core, this book teaches parents how to lead instead of react. Through real-world examples and clear guidance, readers learn how to:
- Replace yelling, threats, and punishment with calm, confident authority
- Build emotional safety without becoming permissive
- Set boundaries without power struggles
- Offer meaningful choices that strengthen responsibility
- End cycles of shame, name-calling, and emotional withdrawal
- Turn everyday challenges into teachable moments
- Communicate in ways that help children feel heard, not controlled
Rather than creating compliance through fear, Parenting: The Rules shows parents how to build cooperation through consistency, empathy, and connection. Parents learn to guide behavior without bribes and nurture relationships grounded in trust rather than tension.
Each precept stands alone as a practical tool, yet together they form a complete parenting philosophy-one that honors the dignity of children while strengthening the leadership role of the parent. The result is a home where both love and structure thrive.
Whether raising toddlers, school-age children, or teenagers, this book helps parents foster relationships that endure. Children raised with these principles are more likely to communicate openly, manage emotions effectively, develop confidence and independence, and grow into compassionate, resilient adults.
Written with clarity and warmth, Dr. Thomson's guidance reflects the realities parents face. Parenting: The Rules is an invitation to break old patterns and step into parenting with confidence, calm, and purpose-one choice, one conversation, and one precept at a time.
Thomson, Susan M.: - Susan M. Thomson, PhD, is a Master Certified Addictions Counselor and Life Coach. In 1985, she graduated from Tulane University in New Orleans, Louisiana, with a degree in experimental social psychology.Before earning her doctorate, she taught special needs children, including those with severe learning disabilities and developmental delays who had been mainstreamed into regular classrooms. While teaching, she worked closely with school psychologists and speech pathologists to address the needs of individual students. She also taught psychology courses at the junior college level. From 1988 to 1993, as a Licensed Professional Counselor, she owned and operated her own eating disorders clinic, providing both individual and group therapy.In 1993, following the birth of her son, she relocated to La Jolla, California. At that time, she turned her focus to parenting and volunteer work in local schools. She became president of the board at The Children's School, where her son was a student. Alongside her husband, Darryl Tschirn, she established the Tschirn Family Library, which remains in place today. In collaboration with other parents, she co-founded a charter school-Explorer Elementary-emphasizing a social-emotional learning curriculum. She also served as president of its board.Later, she became president of the Parents' Association at The Bishop's School (grades 6-12), meeting weekly with the headmaster and leading monthly association meetings.While living in La Jolla, she was appointed vice chair of the Human Relations Commission, an advisory body to the Office of the Mayor of San Diego. In 2015, she received a Certificate of Congressional Recognition from U.S. Congressman Scott Peters for her work in the fight against human trafficking. The San Diego Human Relations Commission also honored her with a Special Commendation for her efforts in human trafficking prevention and restorative justice. In addition, she served four years as vice president of the La Jolla Shores Association, where she received a Special Commendation for Leadership from San Diego City Council President Pro Tem Barbara Bry.
