I wrote this book thinking it was only about dealing with infidelity in a marriage, after completion I was advised my ex has been diagnosed as a narcissist sociopath. I didn't even know what that entailed so I did my research and was I surprised I was reading about my life. This isn't about how to get through it, that will be my next book, this may give you insight if you are or have lived the same thing if you might be living with a narcissist. Remember, sometimes the best choices are the hardest ones to make I wonder, if a man could see the devastation to the one he says he loves, would he make the same choices? Yes if he's a narcissist. It isn't you.I am not a professional therapist or counselor and I do not have a degree from some special school. I am just me, a wife, a mother, a daughter, an aunt and a friend and most of all, a woman.I know that when I was going through some of the toughest times in my life, I had never felt so alone. Oh I had friends that were always there for me, but if you have ever experienced infidelity you will know what I mean when I say you can be in a room full of people and feel like you are the only one in the world. It is a hurt that has many faces. I never knew that so many emotions could exist let alone that you could feel so many of them all at the same time. I was the one that was let down, betrayed and damaged. I remember feeling how very unfair. Here he gets to go out and have his fun, experience whatever temptation it was that was so impossible to say no to, the one that made it worth risking everything we had built together, and yet here I was the only one with the hurdles to cross and the heartache to repair not to mention trust, intimacy, friendship, self-worth, confidence and forgiveness to find. I know that while my world was falling apart I could have used the words of someone who had been there. Not a fix, not a self-help book just the words of someone that had been through the same heartache that would understand. Maybe had I been able to read their story I wouldn't have felt quite so alone or went down the road I did. How many of you out there have heard the words "forget it and move on", "quit dwelling on it", "why are you doing this to yourself", "don't obsess"? Well I have heard each and every one. Why is it that no one seems to understand none of the above are a choice? These are not feelings that are fun to feel or emotions we seek out for what, self-pleasure? Do people not understand that we would gladly never experience another memory of the man we love with some woman if only, it was a choice? So I am telling you my story, maybe as much to help me as to help you. I'm not looking for sympathy or answers because there aren't any no matter how many books you read about forgiveness and how if you turn the other cheek love will get you through. No one will get you through but you. It is a choice to move forward. My second book will cover each chapter of how I moved on or am moving on I'm still not fully there yet. I really hope any of you wondering is it all my fault, everyone gets along with him but me so I must be the problem, will read this book, that was me. He never apologized for cheating he blamed me for the reason he did, has this happened to you? That is only the tip of the ice burg for what he put me through and made me do because I thought if I didn't I would lose him. Don't be me don't take 26 years to figure it out and decide to go or stay, read my story see if it's yours and then decide.I thought the design of the cover should be explained why I picked the one I did.Love is Red. The title Love Conquers All? is in red because the question mark indicates it may. The rose however is in black which symbolized that it may not conquer all. It could go either way.Here's my story
I am from a small town in Ontario. I have written this book to not only heal myself but to help others that may be in the same situation. I am a mother of two wonderful sons. By day I am a bookkeeper by night an author. Sequel to come soon, I'm learning as I go. Feel free to email me with any comments if you decide to read my story and have any questions. sensuousraven@gmail.com
