Hemikrania

Name: Hemikrania
Brand: Atlantic Books
SKU: 9781695042964
Price: 1433.0 INR
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by Ulf Duschat

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ISBN13: 9781695042964
Binding: Paperback
Subject: N/A
Publisher: Independently Published
Publisher Imprint: Independently Published
Publication Date: September 23, 2019
Pages: 258
Original Price: USD 16.17
Language: German
Edition: N/A
Item Weight: 254 grams
BISAC Subject(s): Biographical & Autofiction

About The Book

1968. Pfarrhaus, Kinderzimmer, nachts. Ich schlief tief und fest. Warum, Gott, passierte in dieser Nacht das, was passierte?! Ich erwachte in die Dunkelheit und bemerkte einen riesigen Schatten neben mir, neben meinem Bett. Ich wusste sofort, dass es mein Vater war. Ich hatte Angst, sagte nichts. Dann kam er mit seiner verfluchten Hand unter meine Bettdecke und fing an, mein Geschlecht zu massieren. Ich wagte nicht, mich zu rühren, ich stellte mich tot, hatte gro e Angst und einen unsäglichen Ekel bei dem, was gerade vor sich ging. Mein eigener Vater, den ich bis dahin geliebt hatte, tat mir solches an! Er versuchte, meine Penis steif zu kriegen, ich konnte nichts tun, lag bewegungslos, fürchtete, was noch geschehen würde. Ich stellte mich tot. Er blieb erfolglos zwischen meinen Beinen und zog nach einer Ewigkeit seine Hand weg und verlie das Zimmer. Warum konnte ich nicht nach meinem Bruder um Hilfe schreien, oder nach der Mutter, warum konnte ich nicht aufstehen und ihm eins in die Fresse hauen - ich war noch zu klein, elf Jahre alt und gerade durch OP zum Jungen gemacht worden. Ich hatte diesem Menschen immer vertraut, hatte darin vertraut, dass er mein Vater war. Und jetzt war er nur noch ein Monstrum, dem ich nie wieder vertrauen würde. Oh Gott! Wie Ekelhaft! Ich wei nicht, ob mein Bruder in der Nacht auch da war und schlief. An alles, was unmittelbar danach kam, und was am nächsten Tag, kann ich mich nicht mehr erinnern. Ich hatte nicht das Vertrauen, mit Mutter darüber zu sprechen und ich wusste nicht, wie mein Leben noch weitergehen konnte. Heute wei ich, dass mein Vater mir mein ganzes Leben versaut hat. Er hat mich krank gemacht und Gott hatte tatenlos zugesehen. Ich war knapp zwölf Jahre alt. Jetzt war kein Vater mehr im Haus, sondern ein elendes, homosexuelles, schwules und pädophiles Monster! Es war die Zeit meiner langsam erwachenden Sexualität. Das war noch besonders pervers von diesem Dreckschwein. Ich hatte Bekanntschaft gemacht mit dem Satan. Mein bis dahin sonniges Wesen verdunkelte sich bis hin zu ganzer Schwärze. Fortan hatte ich Angst, dass der Verbrecher wiederkommen würde. Wie konnte ein Vater seinem Kind so etwas Furchtbares antun? Ich wei es bis heute nicht wirklich.

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