Letters to Family: A Year of Coping with Grief
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In the early hours of the morning after his wife's accidental death, Bill Mech chose to write a heartfelt email answering his family's concerns. His children, his in-laws, and his nieces and nephews were not only worried about him but were also struggling with their own grief. He figured he would respond to everyone with a single letter, sent to all.
His effort to connect with his loved ones during this difficult chapter in their lives grew into a form of therapy. The words Mech shared in his letters echoed his relatives' thoughts and emotions--the things he was doing to cope, his milestones, the crushing emotional turbulence, the white-knuckled navigation of suddenly going it alone through both the old and the new. He shared object lessons from meditative walks on trails near his home, reactions to passages of Scripture, insights into how faith might intersect with loss, and records of the family's collective memories of his wife.
When twelve months had passed, Mech realized he had unwittingly written a diary of his first year in grief, along with the fresh signs of healing, embracing "the new normal," and once again feeling joy. It suddenly made sense why he'd found the most helpful books weren't the ones that advise how to pull yourself together, but those that share the ways we all fall apart.
Letters to Family is an epistolary chronicle of one man's journey through grief, and an unconventional example of how to confront your own. May these letters offer you compassion and empathy wherever you are in your journey toward healing.
Bill is an actuary who writes poetry, a risk manager who plays ukulele, a seminary grad who loves pickleball, a singer/songwriter who periodically preaches and teaches, a worship leader who grows wine grapes along his back fence, and a recent widower who now facilitates grief groups. A Jesus-follower for over 50 years, Bill met his late wife Diane while helping start youth worship services using Contemporary Christian Music (before it was called that) during the Jesus Revolution years of the early 1970s. While still teenagers, they married soon after, raised two children to responsible adulthood, mentored young couples as they were once mentored, led Bible studies both together and separately, and retired together during the COVID-19 pandemic. His current vocation involves using words and music, both speaking and singing, to uplift and encourage other Christ-followers. Bill lives in Des Moines, Iowa.
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