In 2004, my daughter Stephanie and I went to a local fish house to have a bowl of chowder and write. Behind the bar was a chalkboard listing some dozen or so flavors of pie. We started writing about pie, then we started rhyming lines aloud, and we went on and on, bringing ourselves to tears with laughter. I searched my journals for those lines yet only found a few. I wonder how I ever forgot that we love writing together.
It came back to us in 2025, when I asked Stephanie for help writing a poem about a tree taking root in an abandoned house, an image from Ocean Vuong found in his celebrated novel The Emperor of Gladness. She shared her version, written on her phone, only a few minutes later. Though perhaps I shouldn't have been, I was floored. My daughter is a natural poet. We exchanged a few more poems during her visit and continued via email. Something was brewing. It was fun, yes, but I was also thinking that we would be missing an opportunity if we didn't delve more deeply into our histories with the writing.
We would be missing an opportunity to share what was most painful for each of us as survivors of childhood sexual assault. We would miss the opportunity to share the truth of how it is to be a survivor of sibling sexual assault and how it is to be not only the mother of a survivor of sibling sexual assault, but also to be the mother of her perpetrator. We could miss an opportunity to more deeply heal our own relationship. We would miss the chance to put this truth into the world, to offer solidarity and validation to other survivors and the significant others in their lives. We would miss the chance to offer the possibility of generational healing.
And then it happened. We "went there." The poems started to fly; little angels appearing in email inboxes like blessings. Words poured out as if they'd been waiting for an invitation. The bulk of the poems in this collection were created in less than 8 weeks.
Each poem began with a shared title, theme, or memory-suggestion more than an instruction. From there, we wrote separately, without reading or discussing each other's work until both of our pieces were complete. Only then did we trade words, meeting one another anew through what was created.
Throughout the book, poems on the same subject appear one after the other, Stephanie's version followed by Kim's. The only time that form is broken is with the opening and closing prayers.
We have navigated this complex path together, and now we invite you to join us-to bear witness to our truth and our healing, through the voices of this mother and daughter finding their way.
- From the introduction by co-author Kim Birdsong
Birdsong, Kim: - Kim Birdsong is counselor, collage artist, poet and photographer. For 16 years she served survivors of sexual assault through her local rape crisis center. While she maintains a limited private practice, her primary work is with grief. She conducts small and large group grief rituals and workshops. Kim is apprenticed to the beauty and integrity of the natural world, and she believes that a creative response to profound pain can foster healing for both the individual and for the community. She lives in Carmel, California, with her labradoodle, Bodhi. This is her second volume of poetry. Visit www.kimbirdsong.com
Schilling, Stephanie: - Dr. Stephanie Schilling is a poet and therapist whose work explores trauma, silence, and the long road toward healing. Trained in forensic psychology and crisis response, she has spent her 13-year career serving community members who experience severe mental illness and sitting with stories others are often afraid to hear. Her poetry is both a return and a release-an act of remembering, reckoning, and reclaiming. She lives in Northern California, where she writes beside her garden and her dog, finding small moments of peace between the heat and storms. She has a part-time private practice where she serves first responders and all other community members. She researches first responders responses to mental health emergencies, and works within the juvenile justice continuum. Visit www.schillingcrisisconsulting.com
