The Year After Kahlia - Surviving, Loving and Writing My Way Through Loss
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The Year After Kahlia is a raw and compassionate account of surviving the first year after the death of her daughter.
Written in the months following her daughter Kahlia's death, Kirsten O'Connor traces the lived reality of grief as it unfolds over time, not as a tidy journey, but as a daily act of survival. This book does not offer platitudes or silver linings. It speaks honestly about shock, numbness, anger, guilt, love, and the profound disruption that loss brings to the body, identity, and inner world.
Blending personal narrative with reflection, the book explores what is happening beneath the surface when grief takes hold, including changes in the nervous system, memory, sleep, and sense of self. Alongside the storytelling are gentle journal prompts and grounding tools, offering language and support for experiences that are often left unspoken.
This is a book for bereaved parents and for anyone walking alongside deep loss. It offers companionship rather than answers, and permission to grieve without timelines, expectations, or performance.
O'Connor, Kirsten: - Kirsten O'Connor is a New Zealand author and grief advocate, and the founder of This Is Grief. After the death of her daughter Kahlia in 2024, Kirsten began writing to survive, to tell the truth about suicide, and to challenge the silence that surrounds grief. Her work blends lived experience with social insight, and focuses on love, loss, and what it means to keep living after the unimaginable.She is the author of The Year After Kahlia: Surviving, Loving, and Writing My Way Through Loss and writes from Aotearoa New Zealand.
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